calm

I started writing an entry a few weeks ago, in which I explained that I felt like I was at sea.

I'm starting to realise I've been at sea for a few years now. I've been trying too hard to find that centre, pushing too hard against the current, getting lost nonetheless - or rather, because of my pushing. I got too tired recently of pushing; and went with the flow.

Even then, I've been irresponsible lately. My finances aren't shored up. My emotional state has been a wreck. My sanity a thread in a delapidated doily.

Tonight, though, for the very first time in a while, I feel calm. It's as if I'm coming to shore.

Guess it's time to find my land legs.